Admitting something ...



I have seen a couple of post's as I whip around blog land this morning that have caught my eye as striking a chord within. I have missed blogging the last few days and am really really wanting to sew but neither of these things have happened. Well in reality I have nothing interesting to blog about as I haven't sewed! LOL.

There are a lot of things going on here and in my mind right now but of course I don't share every little thing that happens on my blog as some things are just not suitable and some things I don't want the whole wide world to have access to.
I try and blog about things that I find uplifting, inspiring and creative. Things I have learned, Insights I have.

On Wednesday night my mind was overflowing with the 'have to do's' - The menu plan not done on Tuesday, the shopping not done as there was no Menu plan, the dishes piled on the bench adjoining the sink....

At the risk of ruining my Blogutation I'll tell you something that I don't tell to people...

I don't do the dishes after dinner. I don't do much in the way of cleaning the kitchen after dinner either. I don't even do them later that night ... are you ready for it ... I leave them there till the next day!!!
I try to do them at some stage in the morning ... but sometimes it is the afternoon. *shrug*

I tell myself I'm I'm tired and really just could not be bothered.
but ... I realised something on Wednesday as I struggled thought the load of Washing up late in the afternoon. Its not that I couldn't be bothered at all, I just don't want to.
That's quite liberating. I don't wash up after dinner because I don't want to, sure it would be glorious to come into a clean kitchen in the morning and you might find me raving about the value of doing this in a year or six months, I have been there before.
Right now I enjoy it more if I do it in the morning, and I enjoy it more if I can see out the window. I gaze out in the daylight at the birds fossicking through my mulch, gaze upon my garden and my weeds, dream about what my yard and house could be, potential storage solutions for my fabric, what colour paint I might one day do the laundry with ... all sorts of random Sunny things.
At night its a dreary job, when the house is quiet. Its solitary and devoid of life.
At night I can only see my own tired reflection in the glass of the window and occasionally a neighbourhood cat will jump up on the window sill chasing moths and scare the living you know what out of me ... this I do not need ...

So I choose to do it in the day, and sometimes I feel guilty and ashamed about it and I envy organised night time kitchen cleaning home-makers and while I'm telling truths ... for the record the last comfort food dinner I served was real, as was the frazzled feeling and attempt at self comfort. On the following night my kids chose spag-o-saurus rather than grilled chicken on bread rolls ( lucky as there weren't enough rolls to go round on Wed ).
Thats Ok. Its not my ideal, but its OK it happens occasionally, it worked for everyone here, no one is malnourished.

I'm telling you this so I don't get accused of telling blies but more so just to let you know everyone has bad, disorganised, imperfect days and feel there might be something they could be doing better. Go with it. Accept it. Find some small beauty in it, something smile worthy ... like the amazing contrast of the rough bark against the fresh green leaves of a tree over your fence, or the smile on your kids faces as the tuck into a 'special treat' of a bowl of Spag-a-saurus.

Thanks to my online friends  Kate and Rhonda Jean for the inspiration behind this post. 


Hope you all have perfectly imperfect weekends.

18 comments:

  1. Your rationale for doing the dishes during the day is a great one... much better to look out the window & see beautiful things than a tired reflection. For my part - well I try to avoid the dishes as much as I can & leave that sort of stuff to my partner. He likes to listen to his ipod as he does them so it works well for both of us.
    I sense that there is a great weight on your shoulders at the moment (of course I could be totally wrong) - I hope it lifts soon.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I don't do the dishes after dinner too. I just do them when I do them. I wake up and see them and hiss at them. Eventually I get around to it. But it bothers me too. Dishes used to be my hubby's job but we swapped jobs. He does the floors now. So I have to force myself to do it more often now.

    Since it bugs me so much, I've started a new routine. Hubby fills the sink when he makes the after dinner cups of tea. I walk over, do the dishes and by the time the tea is cool enough to drink, I'm done. Hope it becomes habit soon... (me@salihan.com)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Tammy you are a woman after my own heart. I don't do dishes at night either if I can help it. I have been this way for years (probably since all my "little washer-uppers" left home.) I like to do the dishes after breakfast and then the kitchen is clean for the day. (Hopefully!)

    BTW myself, my children and now my numerous grandchildren all indulged in the occasional tinned spaghetti and still do. Love it!

    Have been reading your blog since the forum started and I love it. My son lived in Canberra for several years and I loved visiting him there.

    Have a great week-end.

    Cheers! Karen (near Bundaberg)

    ReplyDelete
  4. mm..hear ya...when i was a little sad a little while back and blogging about it..one day i thought how awful it must be for people to be reading my dilemma...but it was right for me...it helped.....it was perfect...i t depends on how we look at being perfect i think...the imperfections and how we get through them make us...sounds like a nice time of day for you to do the dishes..hugs T :)x

    ReplyDelete
  5. I understand how you feel. I find it difficult to accept that things don't need to be done and then when I don't do them I feel guilty! But I know that we are happy and healthy and that's what matters.

    I always have tinned spaghetti and baked beans on hand but every Friday night instead of cooking I use the left overs from the week and we eat those instead, my night off!

    Life is so imperfect in many ways but perfect (family, nature) in other ways.:)

    ReplyDelete
  6. I too am one who 'enjoys' doing the washing up when the sun is up and i can see nature at it's best out my window. Being a mum of 3 with a hubby away working for 5 days each week i find the morning washing up is a good time for 'me time', i very rarely get it any other time so i make the most of it.
    It doesn't matter when you do the housework or that your nightly meal is from a tin on the odd occasion, your family would rather you be there enjoying their company then running around trying to keep house and slave over a hot stove all the time.
    Keep smiling
    -x-

    ReplyDelete
  7. At the moment my theory is that its all about surviving and being good to yourself and those close to you. My kids love those premade ravioli things. I can't bear to look at the ingredients but there are days when i am so happy to chuck them in a pan of boiling water and serve them.
    I try to do the dishes when the whole family are around so I don't feel isolated which is usually straight after dinner but it's now 10.30 and there are pots soaking that I wont get to until tomorrow.
    I hope you have a lovely weekend Miss Tammy and that you get back on that sewing machine really soon. XX
    ps bren is so pleased that his words are getting a bit of use of there.
    pps my word verification is kates !!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thanks Tammy. Have been feeling like a bit of a fraud the last couple of weeks. The wheels have fallen off a bit, home-wise and health-wise. Thanks to your post (and Rhonda Jean's) I feel a little less guilty about the home stuff. Just trying to make the best of where I am right now, and enjoy the little victories. Bless you darling - your post has come at the perfect time. Have a wonderful weekend. Anita. xxx

    ReplyDelete
  9. Honey we all have days when we don't want to do anything - go with it. I am not the best housekeeper, there have been times when people would come over and we would sit outside instead of coming in the house.
    Enjoy your family and I hope you get back to your machine soon.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Thanks for your very honest comments. It has taken me a long time to realize that I can do things as I please and when I want to without worrying about what other people will think. I have also learned to deal with that little voice in my head that tell me what to do and judges me.

    Life is too short.

    Have a nice weekend.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I too never do any dishes at night,i live alone so there fore don't have many,and i alway's cook in the morning's or prepare my meal's in the morning,before it get's hot,if im making caserol's or grilling anything,so all dishes get done together then,and that's it for the day,so don't feel guilty,as you can see a lot of us leave them to the next day.

    ReplyDelete
  12. We all have our ways! At our house we have never had a car in the garage for more than a couple months at a time before some project makes that impossible for several more weeks or months. I envy the neat and tidy white painted garages with tool outlines on the pegboard...but that will never happen here.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I am a morning person - get so much more done then - so in the weekends I often leave the dishes for the morning. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  14. There is true beauty in contrast, thank you for reminding me of this Tammy xxx

    ReplyDelete
  15. Such a great post! I had a little giggle because I always do my dishes - but you know what?? My dh is away for 11 days and the dishes are piling up everywhere, it's fabulous :)) LOL
    Melxx

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hi Tammy, I haven't visited for a while so I read what I had missed and I remembered how much I enjoy your blog, and love reading your thoughts. I have seen a great difference in our youngest daughter's behavious since we really limited tv viewing to a couple of hours in the weekend. It's almost like her mind goes lazy when she starts off her day with tv., even with the programs that I consider very good! As for imperfection/s well, I am The master of that and I agree with you- we just have to live with it because that's how it will always be! But I did just read a book called 'Sink Reflections' and my sink is mostly shining(she says blushing)but then again who knows what book I will be reading in two months...hehe!!(and I made the bread too, it was such a ...deliscrumptious...thing!)
    Annamaria ;)

    ReplyDelete
  17. Listen to you!!!! Why the guilt in the first place! We all have to do what works even when our minds tell us to do differently. It is liberating when we suddenly accept what we do and just be happy with that. REALLY what does it matter if my ironing pile still sits after five days on the chair, my laundry pile is sitting there for two days, the dining table has crumbs on it and my bed needs changing. A happy mum and then a oh so happy family. On that note I need get to bed!

    ReplyDelete
  18. I hear you, our dishes only get done because my husband does them, I am so over it by the time dinner is prepared and eaten!

    I think all bloggers blog for different reasons and about different things, and that's okay, you do what is right for you. There is an audience out there for every blog, regardless of content or style. It's about being true to yourself and blogging what you want to blog in the way you want to do it.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks so much for stopping by and letting me know you were here. x
Have a happy Day.