Since I started my new job I often and most of the time feel a bit like this guy ... just holding on and trying to maintain balance against the flow.
|Holding on for his life, on my neighbours roof in a fierce wind|
I love my job, because of it I'm struggling to reconcile things at home.
I now work on what used to be my 'child free days' so I don't have any luxury mental down time days any more, well I have gone from at least two a week to sometimes one a fortnight.
I frequently hear things like, 'there are no pants in my drawer', 'Mum, I don't have any socks' and 'we had that for dinner two nights ago'. My ironing board is permanently set up in the living area, the once ( recently ) empty ironing basket is overflowing again and I do not recall when the last time I Vacced the floor was.
I miss having home baked goodies to pop into lunch boxes and on hand for snacks. I'm usually super tired and going to bed early.
The weekend was gorgeous in terms of weather.
Saturday I went and did some crafty things and had a natter to a very dear and old friend which was gold for my soul. While I was out LOML knuckled down and got stuck into the routine housework things that were weighing me down, the dishes, washing, kitchen, bins ... general stuff. Love you Babe. Thanks so much.
On Sunday he mowed and I weeded a section and mulched it. There is still about 3/4 the ornamental bed to go, but it felt good to be out in the sun and doing something productive and physical.
I 'm thinking a time will come where I will feel that no mental down time is 'normal' and adjust to it accordingly and that with that normality and acceptance an ability to do the other things with more ease will accompany it.
I'm trying to remember that what I tell my self is what I begin to believe so saying I'm so tired and I can't do this and its overwhelming are not helpful things to have running around in my head.
I went to bed with a head ache exhausted last night and made a decision to think about what was possible for me to do today and what I would do this morning, such as work with energy and enthusiasm, enjoy the progress and feel less pressure.
I have a few items of my basic house keeping under my belt and have run an errand, I feel I have regained some footing today and am happy with what I am hearing. The tiredness and headache are starting to creep in now but as I have made progress they are not debilitating to the degree I might otherwise let them be. There's still time for a power nap which really works wonders for me. 10 or 15 mins are wonderful.
I have once again been reminded that sometimes a break to feed your soul and spirit with a non essential detour is really the direction you need to go in to stay on track.
If you have a negative mantra swimming around in your head try changing its pattern and see what is possible :)
Tammy, I think you just need to give yourself time. You've only been doing your new job for a short time, everything will settle into a pattern that suits you. You'll be fine. Power naps are good! xxxReplyDelete
Tammy, it is a hard balancing act we women perform. I think you will find ways to deal with it all. Don't forget to drink water. I know when I was working, I often forgot and headaches crept on...something simple you can do for yourself.ReplyDelete
I agree with Laura -- give yourself time. If it gets too much you can reassess. I used to forget to breath when I got stressed, try just stopping and concentrating on your breathing.ReplyDelete
Life is a constant balancing act, especially for a working mother. Give yourself time and you'll work out what's important and how to get it done. *hugs*ReplyDelete
I agree with all of those lovely comments wnd so what if this doesn't get done or that dorsn't get done, they will still be there tomorrow and the next day to get done. And remember to take time out for yourself like the the crafting with your friend, we all need it every once in a while.ReplyDelete
Great post Tammy. Negative thoughts are so powerful in themselves. It is so important that you MAKE time to care for yourself. I'm sending you loads of positive and encouraging thoughts your way - you'll work it all out.ReplyDelete
you bet T....the power of thought...it helps move mountains :)ReplyDelete
Thanks for the reminder about negative thoughts. I think you do believe whatever you tell yourself. hard to keep in check though....ReplyDelete
i'm hearing you...working 4 days is almost too much for me...ReplyDelete
So much truth here, thank you for the reminder. I am sure that you will find yourself a more satisfying rhythm to the week with time. Good luck.ReplyDelete
I hope your week has gone well Tammy and the flow of your routine gets settled so you can find time to do the things you love best. Hugs xoReplyDelete