Not quite Empty

I have had a couple of weeks where I am just consistently using a high level of emotion to deal with things a large percentage of the time, and its exhausting.An Aunt died. In a very tragic circumstance, one so very hard for me to fathom.She was dear sweet heart. As someone from within the family died it had me put some of my own family ties and relationships under the microscope. I was forced to give energy to someone I'd rather not think about, in support of another family member too. 
You know there is this person that I have just elected not to deal with as they don't deserve my time, emotion or thought. They were being supremely hurtful to someone I do care for and that was draining.

Zucchini and bacon Frittata.

I have become friends with a sweet, mature, witty, clever, young girl through my place of work and someone has made her think that they see her as stupid and worthless. Hence making her question herself. This pains me a lot and I want to erase that persons opinion from her mind and put her back in the confident shoes she was wearing only weeks ago. This situation really gives rise to my protective mother instincts.I have little energy to give my kids and am being far from a good available partner right now too. I'm trying to refill my emotional tank and distribute it's contents appropriately. The Mr's Sister was here on a flying visit from London and I made a meal of a simple wholesome Frittata served with salad containing tomatoes from the garden. It was easy and delicious and was a good deposit in my tank.  I'm making an effort to go out and take photographs and absorb some of the peace and delight of nature.I'm trying less successfully to read, de-clutter and re energise.Its a slow process but I'll get there if I keep working at it :)

6 comments:

  1. Even the smallest of baby steps is a step in the right direction Tammy. Take it easy my friend x

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  2. OH Tammy emotional energy is exhausting stuff!

    Ride with it and do what you feel works. SO good you are not driven by others.

    Like you said you will recover - it is just going through the process.

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  3. Sorry for your loss Tammy and how sweet of you to be there for a fellow co worker.Dont stress yourself too much i know that your little family will be there for you as you are always there for them.(and as we your bloggy followers are)
    xx

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  4. Hugs T!!
    If you need a chat I am here :)

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  5. {hugs} to you dear sweet Tammy x

    I'm sorry to hear about your Aunt, I hope the sweet memories you have of time spent with her will help you cope at this time.

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